We build our lives around goals, purchases, and achievements that, while meaningful, may never match the excitement we felt leading up to them.
Welcome to the dopamine delusion!
This cycle plays out in everyday life:
The more we have, the more we want. The more things we acquire and the easier things get for us, the more discontent we feel.
The more spoiled we become as a society with technology and our easy first world lifestyles, the more we complain. To paraphrase the U2 song, we still haven't found what we're looking for.
In the course of my business career I have met and worked with some very successful wealthy business people and for the majority of them the money is never enough, they are always seeking ways of making more money. It's a race with no finish line.
For the most part, they are like John D. Rockefeller who when asked: "How much money is enough money?" Allegedly answered: “just a little bit more.”
So, in an age where we are constantly chasing the next goal, craving the next hit of excitement, or awaiting the next notification, it’s easy to believe that the joy of life lies in achieving.
This is the core of what can be called "The Dopamine Delusion".
Hardwired For Anticipated Rewards
A large part of the human brain is wired to anticipating and responding to rewards.
This system involves various brain regions, including the prefrontal cortex, the ventral striatum, and the nucleus accumbens.
As a neurotransmitter, dopamine plays a crucial role in this process, being released both when a reward is anticipated and when it is received.
This anticipation of reward can shape our choices and influence our behavior, driving us towards actions that are likely to lead to what we think are more positive outcomes.
Popular science often portrays dopamine as the brain’s pleasure chemical, but this is a misconception.
This means that the brain releases the most dopamine before the reward is obtained in the space of longing, hoping, and chasing.
Once the reward arrives, dopamine levels often return to baseline or even dip, especially if the outcome was expected.
The Science Behind the Chase
The most well-established theory explaining this phenomenon is known as Reward Prediction Error (RPE).
This theory suggests that dopamine neurons fire based on the difference between expected and actual outcomes:
This mechanism allows the brain to learn from experience and adjust behavior accordingly.
This means that our strongest neurological "highs" come from surprise or novelty - not from predictable, well-earned success.
The Shift from Reward to Cue
Neuroscientific studies have shown that over time, dopamine responses shift from the reward itself to the cue that predicts the reward.
For example, in early learning stages, an animal may show a dopamine spike when receiving food. But after repeated trials, the spike occurs when a light or sound—predicting the food—appears.
The reward becomes neurologically less exciting than the signal that it is coming.
This helps explain why the build-up to an event - such as planning a vacation, awaiting a package, or anticipating a romantic date - often feels more thrilling than the event itself.
Addiction and the Trap of Anticipation
This dopamine-driven anticipation loop becomes particularly dangerous in the context of addiction.
Drugs, gambling, and even digital behaviors like social media use can hijack the brain’s dopamine system.
In these cases, the craving (anticipation) becomes stronger and more neurologically reinforced than the actual act of using the drug or engaging in the behavior.
People suffering from addiction often report that the urge to use is more intense than the experience of using.
The dopamine system isn’t delivering pleasure per se; it’s screaming, "Do it again!" regardless of whether the outcome is enjoyable or destructive.
While dopamine fuels our motivation to pursue goals, serotonin plays a different but complementary role in the reward landscape:
One of the most powerful ways to cultivate serotonin is by pursuing achievements that are deeply aligned with your core values.
When you achieve something that resonates with what truly matters to you - whether it's honesty, compassion, creativity, or contribution - the brain is more likely to reward you with enduring satisfaction.
This is because values-aligned behavior taps into a different kind of reward system - one that transcends fleeting excitement.
The Existential Implications
From an existential perspective, the dopamine delusion mirrors ancient wisdom:
Understanding the dopamine system - and serotonin’s role as a stabilizer - allows you to step back from the illusion that the next achievement will complete you.
Looking at the bigger picture, the two fundamental themes of this site are: how to think and how to stop thinking.
In this context, having a high-level understanding of how your brain works and why it works as it does is an important thinking skill.
As with all of the practical resources that I share on this site it does require a certain amount of conscious effort to implement, but the payback is huge.
Underpinning all of this is the pragmatic view that over the long term, the outcomes that you experience in your life are determined by how you respond to the events in your life.
Many of the things that happen in your life are random and beyond your control.
But, the one thing you can control is how you choose to respond to these events - and it is a choice. To paraphrase Victor Frankl:
"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is your power to choose your response. In your response lies your growth and your freedom."
Reclaiming Agency: How to Use This Insight
[1] Working With Dopamine Rather than trying to eliminate dopamine-driven behavior, here are a few ways you can learn to work with it:
[2] Cultivating Serotonin Inducing Practices
Conclusion
References
Return from: "The Dopamine Delusion" to: Walking The Talk
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