How To Tell The Difference Between Intuition and Anxiety.
How do you know whether the voice of your intuition is real or just the product of your inner anxiety?
We all struggle with these inner voices as we try to work out whether it is the inner devils of our insecurities and anxieties that are talking, or whether we are hearing the voices of the better angels of our nature offering intuitive guidance.
Here's how to tell whether you are hearing the voice of intuition or the voice of anxiety.
It Isn't The Process Of Prayer That’s The Problem, It’s The Way It’s Framed.
Regardless of what we feel about Madonna or her song the topic of prayer often arouses strong reactions.
Usually, it is something that we associate with organised religion and for most of us this is not on our current radar.
For the modern person who is not a practitioner or devotee of a faith tradition this framing of prayer does not resonate.
Here is an alternative approach.
We Follow The Herd - We Mimic Other People's Choices.
Fear of missing out - or FOMO as it is popularly referred to - is the feeling that everyone else in your peer group is having much more fun than you are.
FOMO is an emotional response of envy, jealousy, inadequacy and at root a deep seated insecurity reflecting fragile self-esteem.
Here's how to deal with it.
Exercising Balance and Discernment.
I have just updated these self improvement resources with a number of additional sources of material that are practical and can help you change your life.
Check it out. It's all free!
This Is The You That Is Beyond Your Thinking Mind.
This is the big you, the transcendent you, the you that is often referred to as your higher consciousness or higher self.
This is the you that acts as your conscious mind's portal to the universe, everything conventionally thought of as outside of you.
This is the you that is connected to every thing and everyone else.This is the non-dualistic you that does not see distinction between 'this and that' and experiences 'everything' as unity.
Here's how to connect with your higher self.
Gratitude And Attitude Are Not Challenges, They Are Choices.
The power of gratitude quite simply is that it is good for you!
Many of us were raised by parents who instilled in us the social niceties of saying "please" and "thank you".
Whilst those ingrained courtesies have their place in oiling the wheels of social intercourse there is an important dynamic at work in the expression of gratitude, and it comprises two elements, namely framing and focus.
How you mentally characterize a situation has a profound impact on how you respond to it emotionally and, over time, this has a significant effect on the results you create in your own life and in the lives of others.
Develop A Good Working Relationship With Your Mind.
The first step in living with your thoughts is to understand and develop a good working relationship with all areas of your mind.
The key to developing a good working relationship with your mind is to have tools, techniques and resources that work with all levels of your mind.
The second key factor in living with your thoughts is to understand your many selves and learn how to deal with them.
Here are 4 sets of tools to help you that each work with one or more areas of your whole self:
The 4 Stages To Dealing With Your Thoughts.
You are not your thoughts, at least that's what your rational mind tells you most of the time, but that's definitely not how it feels at 3 am when you have woken up and can’t get back to sleep.
So how do we deal with our negative thoughts: thoughts of anger, accusation and despair?
There are the four stages in dealing with your thoughts: awareness of your thoughts; understanding your thoughts; accepting your thoughts; and, living with your thoughts.
4 Key Tips To Help You Finish What You Start.
So why do you fail to finish what you start? Or in my case, why do I fail to even get started?
There is a wealth of information out there about how to avoid procrastination, how to get started and how to finish what you start and yet for so many of us this area is huge problem.
Here are 4 key tips to finish what you start, and all based on extensive personal experience.
You may find some of these tips counter-intuitive, but believe me they do work and are effective.
Life Is Non-Linear, Which Makes The Rewards Of Continued Effort Disproportionately Big.
In the pursuit of a long term goal you have to go countless extra miles to set yourself up for a big success.
Going the extra mile in the long game is so hard to play because it involves taking a series of very small steps, that people rarely see, persistently and consistently over a long period of time to reach an enormous and visible outcome.
Here are 7 proven strategies, with resources, for going the extra mile in the pursuit of a long term goal.
How To Be Lived By The Tao.
The Tao Te Ching is one of those books that many people read, few understand, and even fewer put into practice.
The only way to know the Tao is to experience it, and it is experienced in your heart not your head.
The words in the Tao Te Ching are not a belief system. This is not something that you can grasp intellectually.
"Only in being lived by the Tao can you truly be yourself."
Everything Does Not Revolve Around Me.
The two phrases dying to self & dropping the ego are Christian and Buddhist expressions of the same fundamental truth - the need to correct the inbuilt, hardwired tendency to assume that everything revolves around "me".
This is all about achieving a balance between the harmony and peace of the inner world of consciousness and awareness with the requirements of surviving and functioning effectively in the outer world of duality.
This balance occurs when we draw daily guidance and inspiration from our inner world and execute and implement with our thinking minds.
Peak Performance Is Meditation In Motion.
Peak performance is grounded in the Tao practise of Wu Wei which means "doing with out doing". This is all about how you take action by being so immersed in profound concentration on what you are doing that you are "in the zone".
The foundation for achieving this state requires you to have achieved unconscious competence in exercising the required skills to undertake the required tasks and activities. i.e. to function on auto-pilot.
Here are the 4 keys to building the confident mind:
Steer The Boat Each Day Rather Than Plan Ahead Way Into The Future.
Going with the flow is about learning to become comfortable with uncertainty, and learning how to exploit the potential hidden within it, both to feel better in the present and to achieve more success in the future.
Uncertainty is where things happen.
It is where the opportunities – for success, for happiness, for really living – are waiting.
A Timeless Foundation On Which To Build Your Success.
There are Universal laws and processes that work to support us and guarantee that we achieve all our goals.
But first we need to know what they are, and then follow them!
You will certainly achieve your success and it will be in exact proportion to the clarity and depth of definition of your vision, the persistence of your focus on that vision, the level of your trust and the depth of your gratitude to the process that will deliver your vision.
A Love That Will Not Let You Go.
I had a loving father. I knew that I did, but I never felt it.
My father was a good man but very damaged and unable to show his feelings. So I grew up knowing in my head that I was loved, but not feeling it in my heart.
This is a common experience. Many of us, for one reason or another, grow up with little or no sense of a loving father and often we may not even realise the absence of the felt sense of that love until much later in life.
As a child I went through a period of idolising my father and in a way he was like a god to me, but always distant and never felt.
The love of a father has a special quality to it - a deep sense of comfort and all encompassing protection - a feeling of being taken care of, and a source of guidance, direction and inspiration.
Deep within all of us is a basic, primeval need to be loved, loved by someone, loved by anyone, just loved.
How To Stay Connected To Your True Source Of Power.
Approximately 2,500 years ago the Israeli town of Kafr Qasim was close to the site of two battles between the ancient Israelis and their neighbours and enemies the Philistines, a war-like people said to have originally migrated from Crete.
In keeping with their belief system, the ancient Israeli's viewed themselves as JHWH's chosen people, and JHWH was their source of guidance and power. But they left JHWH and worshiped foreign gods.
The result was they suffered major military defeats. So they changed back to following JHWH and in the ensuing battle the Israelis prevailed and the Philistines were decisively defeated.
After the battle, the Israelis erected a stone monument and called it "Ebenezer" which means in Hebrew "Stone Of Help".
An Ebenezer stone of help is a constant reminder to stay connected to your true source of power.
How To Deal With The Attrition Factor.
The Stockdale Paradox is named after the late James Stockdale, former vice presidential candidate, naval commander and prisoner of war during the American-Vietnam war.
It became well known having been featured in author and business guru Jim Collins’ book “Good To Great” following extensive interviews between Collins and Stockdale exploring how Stockdale survived 8 years of imprisonment and torture.
Collins’ specific focus was to identify the principles that underpinned Stockdale’s survival and emergence at the end of the war as not only unbroken but as source of practical inspiration.
We Celebrate Success And Ignore Failure.
Numerous studies have been undertaken on successful people to understand what it was that they did to become so successful, how they did it and when they did it - and we are led to believe that we too can achieve comparable success if we replicate this.
We are told by the self-help gurus: “You can be anything you want to be, if you put your mind to it.”
But what the self help gurus tell you is just not true.
How You Got Into The Wilderness Matters Less Than The Lessons To Be Learnt There.
The wilderness years can be described as any lengthy time, longer than a year, that is spend aimlessly; without an immediate purpose, or without a current goal.
The internal psychological, emotional and spiritual landscape of the wilderness state is one of being unable to find one's way, of aloneness, bewilderment, confusion and disconnection.
Here are 3 key lessons to successfully navigating your route through the wilderness years.
We Live In A World That Glorifies The Results And Not The Process.
We all know what we should be doing, but the trouble with that is that sooner of later we get bored.
The enjoyment fades, the excitement and novelty wears thin, and we're left with the hard grind.
The same old same old - just the boring old basics.
But it’s hard to be above average if you can’t find a way to do the same thing over and over again.
You Can Master The Art of Creating Your Own Luck By Mastering 4 Key Principles
"The Luck Factor" is the title of a book published 20 years ago based on the research of Professor Richard Wiseman who for more than 10 years, examined the behaviour of 1,000 volunteers who considered themselves lucky or unlucky.
In summary, his findings show that lucky people are people who have consciously or unconsciously mastered the art of generating their own good fortune via four basic principles.
Just Because You Have A Spectacular Failure Doesn’t Mean The Game Is Over.
The thought that you could fail can really slow you down.
But the problem is not the failure, the problem is your relationship with failure.
And what do you do after a big failure?
You shrug it off and get right back to work the next day working on your goals.
Acknowledge and fix problems one by one. Keep learning and adapting.
Are You Lost In Transition?
To be in an alien North African city, late in the evening, in the dark, completely lost in transition from the main market square back to the obscure location of our Riad, with no tools for navigation, and finding it impossible to communicate with the locals, was frightening.
That experience of being lost in transition in the Medina, in Marrakesh, illustrates the locational disorientation we can experience when we experience an unexpected change in circumstances, and especially a change that is imposed upon and that leads to hard times.
Transition is a journey - a psychological and emotional journey - and here's how to cope with it.
Do You Believe What You See Or Do You See What You Believe?
Like the characters in "The Matrix" we are fooled by the illusion that what we see is how things really are. Why? Because this is the mind's default setting. It sees:
- Things “out there”.
- A world of circumstances and events and situations.
- The present moment through the lens of its own inner map of reality which it links up seamlessly with its memory of a past and it conjecture and projection of a future.
We confuse this inner map of reality with the world as it is.
What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others?
If you knew you were going to die tonight and you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would you say was the meaning of your life?
Generativity occurs when a person shifts his/her energy to care for a change which will help the generations to come.
It can also be seen as ‘making your mark on the world’ by caring for others and accomplishing something beyond yourself for making this world a better place.
What difference will you make? What impact will you leave in the lives of others?
If You Want Others To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. If You Want To Be Happy, Practice Compassion.
Compassion is derived from the Latin words "com pati" meaning to suffer with.
It has been defined as an empathic understanding of a person's feelings, accompanied by altruism, or a desire to act on that person's behalf.
In practical terms it is when you relate to someone’s situation, and you want to help them. You see someone having a hard time, and you show up beside them and offer a helping hand.
There are some interesting personal benefits to be derived from the expression of compassion. Not only does the recipient benefit but so does the person who is giving compassion...
The Power Of Expectation Of An Outcome Regardless Of The Lack Of Any Substance To That Expectation.
Traditionally, the placebo effect occurs when false, or dummy, treatments of inert substances [that appear to be real but aren't] are administered during trials on new drugs, and patients still see their symptoms improve.
About 1 in 3 people report that they are feeling better after they have received a placebo. However this has increased to 60% in certain recent drugs trials.
The power and the benefit of the placebo lies in how it makes people feel.
This Is What Will Happen After You Take It.
"This is your last chance," rebel leader Morpheus tells Neo, holding a coloured pill in each hand. “You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes."
Taking the red pill is a symbolic action and a metaphor for an experience of enlightenment and transcendent awakening.
This article is describes my experience of what happens when you do.
This Has To Be One Of The Best Ways For Living The Best Life You Can Possibly Live.
An online search on life hacks will invariably provide you with multiple links to ways of increasing your productivity and efficiency in many areas of life.
But in this article I want to raise your sights and share two simple-to-understand science based principles that when combined will, over-time, transform your health, wealth and happiness.
I will tell you what to do, how to do it, and why you most likely won't!
There are no gimmicks here and this is absolutely not about how to "get rich quick".
The Blessing And The Curse Of Impermanence.
There is a story of a king who sought wisdom. Eventually he heard of a man living in a remote part of the kingdom who had a reputation for great wisdom.
The king sent for this man and had him brought to court, and the king offered the man a great reward if he would share the secret to his wisdom. The man agreed and departed from the king’s presence.
He returned several weeks later and presented the king with a ring. The wise man counselled the king:
“Wear that ring that at all times and look at it frequently, and regardless of whether you are experiencing good fortune or adversity remind yourself that this too will pass…”
The Stories That We Tell Ourselves Are A Matter Of Choice.
The stories we tell ourselves form the backcloth and the tapestry of our lives.
These narratives shape and define our sense of self and how and where we see ourselves fitting into the bigger picture of the circumstances of our life.
The stories that we tell ourselves also form the lens through which we interpret life. The effect of this is that we tend to see what we expect to see and life can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
So choose wisely the stories that you tell yourself.
Trust Is A Choice And It Creates Your Reality.
Nothing in life is permanent and nothing lasts forever.
Every relationship ends in tears.
Somebody leaves or somebody dies.
This is how things are.
This is the nature of things.
Nobody has the perfect life.
Who do you trust?
Finding This Hidden Value Is The Key To A Huge Upside.
Most of us spend our lives working to linear rules where there is an equal relationship between effort and result. Work hard you get a result. Work harder you get a better result.
Live lived on these terms means that you only win by working harder than everyone else. But of course, the harder other people work, the harder you have to work just to stay in the same relative position.
The solution to this challenge is to work to non-linear rules. This involves finding a situation where the positive results of your efforts are very considerably amplified.
This is life lived in positive asymmetry - where you have a lot of upside and minimal downside.
How To Be There When Preparation Meets Opportunity.
The growth mindset holds the core belief that your intelligence and personality is something you can develop and that you can expand and grow.
The passion for stretching yourself and sticking to it, even (or especially) when it’s not going well, is the hallmark of the growth mindset.
This is the mindset that allows you to thrive during some of the most challenging times in your life.
If you can't think of the right thing to say, say nothing.
The concepts we employ, the categorizations we apply and the words we choose and use to articulate a direct experience put us in a double bind, and it is this:
For all that we gain by being able to speak about an experience we lose a greater amount of the full meaning of that experience by speaking it.
To Believe Or Not To Believe - That Is The Question.
Nothing has inflicted more suffering on humanity than its beliefs and dogmas.
The religious and cultural beliefs that sanction and allow or impose suppression and subjugation of women's rights, the persecution of minorities, the criminalisation and killing of gay people, female genital mutilation, child marriage, honour killings... the list is endless and in all cases:
Believing themselves to be right, clinging to their beliefs, to the point of killing to defend their view of the rightness of their position.
Who would you be without that belief?
How To Stay Far From The Madding Crowd.
Herd mentality describes how we make decisions based on what everyone else is thinking and doing. It is also known as a mob or crowd mentality.
We follow the herd - and often without realizing it - we mimic other people's choices.
When we are uncertain about what's normal, we trust what others are doing as the most appropriate thing to do.
Here are 3 tips to help you protect yourself from herd mentality.
We Suffer Every Time We Believe A Thought That Argues With What Is.
When your mind is perfectly clear, what is, is what you want.
If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try to teach a cat to bark. You can try and try, and in the end the cat will look up at you and say, “Meow.”
Wanting reality to be different than it is - is hopeless.
Much of the stress that you feel is caused by arguing with what is. Here is an approach to help you address this.
Slack Is The Capacity To Effect Change And The Resource To Deal With The Unexpected.
Many organizations are obsessed with efficiency and try to ensure that every resource is fully utilized to its fullest capacity. These organizations usually have a culture where people are expected to work ridiculously long hours.
In our personal lives many of us are also obsessed with the chimera of maximum efficiency and stuff our schedules full of tasks that occupy every waking hour.
But this corporate and personal obsession with efficiency fails to understand that efficiency and effectiveness are not the same thing - we need slack.
Less and less do you need to force things, until you arrive at non-action.
We are brought up to believe that we get what we want in life as a result of what we do, by the actions that we take, that hard work, is the key to a better life.
How do we know when you are "trying too hard"?
You cross that line when you have acquired and mastered the necessary skills to become unconsciously competent and your consistent and persistent activity in exercising those skills becomes counter-productive.
Is It Helping You Or Hindering You?
Your point of focus is the central point of your attention.
Your point of focus is a binary choice and the result of that choice is critical to your happiness, your inner peace, and your ability to create what you want in life.
You can either focus on what you want and what you want to move toward.
Or, you can focus on what you don't want, what you want to avoid, what you are afraid of, what you are worried about, and what you want to move away from.
To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for.
The purpose of this article is to look at the foundation of the secret for success, in any area of your life.
There is one very basic and powerful factor. It is easy to understand and is fundamental to your nature.
It is the way that people in all walks of life have achieved success from the beginning of time.
It is the building block upon which all success is built and the rocket fuel that powers it...
Discover The Joy Of A Quiet Mind
Can you stop thinking? According to Zen Buddhist priest Shunmyo Masuno the art of not thinking about anything is not easy to achieve. Even practising monks find it difficult.
But it is possible.
Imagine being able to stop thinking at will, on demand, at any time and in any place.
Imagine being able to create a space in your head where there are no thoughts and no emotions... just space and awareness of the sounds and smells and visual images around you...awareness of the sensation of your breath entering and leaving your body.
What Is Holding You Back From Pursuing Your Dreams?
Your self confidence is based on ability. Your self confidence is all about your level of trust, faith and belief in your abilities [your power] and capabilities [your potential].
There is a deeper question that lies behind the question of HOW you build self confidence and that is WHY do you need to build self confidence?
Learning how to overcome fear and perform powerfully is a skill that we all need to acquire as fear of failure affects most of us at some point in our lives.
Whilst it is natural to feel a level of fear and anxiety in difficult situations, and this can be a powerful stimulant to an excellent performance, it can also be debilitating and hold us back from doing our best or - in extreme cases - cause us to not engage.
The technique I am sharing here is an NLP based technique that I have used a number of times to very great effect.
You are creating hell on earth when you are too subsumed within your underlying and deeply embedded negative energetic states.
To counter your dissatisfactions and misery you initially go unconscious and over-indulge in all the usual distractions...
You recharge your batteries and get back on track only to revert to type with your usual activities of miss-creation driven by underlying negative energetic states.
The result of all this is that you end up repeating the cycle and "chasing your tail" to make up for the impacts of the unintentional miss-creations of your negative energy.
How you mentally characterize a situation has a profound impact on how you respond to it emotionally.
There is a direct causal link between how you think about a situation, the words you use to articulate those thoughts, the energetic state associated with those words, and the results you create.
Changing your dominant emotional or energetic state has a profound effect on the positive creations and results that you experience, so any change to the way you frame a situation is going to have a significant impact on those creations and results.
Change your language to change your results.
What good is a universe without somebody around to look at it?
What Conclusions Can We Draw About Living In A Participatory Universe?
The inescapable conclusion is that the world and the universe (within which we see it positioned) is the result of mind.
This does not suggest individual human mind (in the sense of I see whatever I choose to see) but a collective transpersonal mind – perhaps better described as a cosmic consciousness.
Put simply: there is something out there holding it all together, and I call it "The Energy Of Life”.