The secret for success is a popular topic with many articles online discussing the qualities of successful people and how we can benefit from developing these qualities.
There is a lot of focus on persistence and perseverance, self belief and risk taking and this is all good stuff, and I have written elsewhere about these broader themes of success factors.
But the purpose of this article is to look at the foundation of the secret for success, in any area of your life.
There is one very
basic and powerful factor. It is easy to understand and is
fundamental to your nature.
It is the way that people in all walks of life have achieved success from the beginning of time.
It is the building block upon which all success is built and the rocket fuel that powers it, and it is desire.
To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for.
Imagine
you were lost in a desert and you soon become hot and thirsty. You
would do or give just about anything to get a drink of cool, clear
water.
This overpowering thirst is what we refer to as a "Core Desire".
Put very simply, what do you want out of life? What is your core desire?
A powerful metaphor for finding your core desire is provided by the story
of the Zen master who was repeatedly asked by a very devout and seeking
student:
"Master, what does it take for me to reach enlightenment?"
The Zen master ignored the student. She asked again and was ignored. Eventually she said:
"Master, please tell me, what must I do to reach enlightenment?"
The Zen master grabbed the student by the scruff of the neck and held her head under water in a nearby water trough.
30 seconds later he pulled the student's head up and then immediately plunged her head back under water.
This
process repeated a few times until eventually the Zen master relented -
whereupon he said to the gasping half drowned student:
"When you seek Zen as you now seek air - THEN you will find it."
I have known a number of people who really are not living the lives
they want to, and have clearly not found the secret for success in their lives. In many cases this is as a result of parental and
family expectations.
Often this dissatisfaction manifests in midlife and it can cause or accompany a typical mid-life crisis.
Regardless of your age or stage in life, the process for establishing your personal secret for success is the same and it follows these 3 key steps:
1. Accurately identify your Core Desire
Core
Desires are those things you want so badly that you will do or become
whatever it takes to get them, no matter how hard it is or what the risk
or expense is.
These are things that your heart is set on — things you want with all your heart.
Core Desires are the things that you would be prepared to die trying for.
2. Unleash a powerful force that lies within you
When
your core desire is so strong that you would stake your life on it then
it is aligned with one of the most powerful drivers you have - your
survival instinct.
This life-force is overwhelming powerful, and
when your subconscious mind realises that you will risk anything and everything to
achieve your core desire it sees the achievement of that desire as part
of your survival.
With this drive, fueled by passion, commitment
and persistence you can and will overcome all obstacles. It won't be
easy, it may get bloody, but you will ultimately succeed.
Without this drive, you will likely give in or give up.
3. Find a teacher, mentor or coach to help you realize your core desires and focus your drive.
Without
this assistance, guidance and support, especially in the beginning, you
may not gain the knowledge, master the skills, and endure all the
hardships and setbacks along the way.
Whenever possible, I have chosen to spend time with and work with people
who are more intelligent, more capable and more successful in business
than me and with others who are more spiritual and insightful than I
will ever be.
This area is massively important and I have written an article about the importance of the company you keep.
Over time you become like the company you keep, so choose it wisely and well.
My experiences
When I was in my mid to late teens I was very aware of two powerful core
desires and drivers in my life, and at that time they seemed
irreconcilable.
On the one hand I wanted to be a businessman and
make money and on the other hand I wanted to follow a spiritual path and
perhaps become a monk (which will amuse any of my friends who know me
well)!
Gradually as the years rolled by I began to see that these two drives were intertwined in ways that I had not anticipated.
The ups and especially the downs of my business life has been
the catalyst for a lot of personal development and spiritual growth, and
income generated through my business has enabled me to sponsor and
support various spiritual initiatives and activities. This website is an
example of this.
In more recent times this has enabled me to
take a deeper interest in mentoring and providing ongoing support to a
number of people.
Life purpose
I was sitting in a bar in Singapore a while ago
with a bunch of expat friends enjoying some beers and a chat. The
conversation took an interesting turn when one of them suddenly asked
the group:
"If you knew you were going to die tonight and
you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would
you say was the meaning of your life?"
On hearing that question I suddenly had a moment of clarity and I realised that for me the answer was (and remains):
What difference did I make? What impact will I leave in the lives of others?
My core desires haven't changed since I first became aware of them many years ago. The desire to be a successful businessman and the desire to be a spiritual man are still as powerful as they ever were.
I have found that my desire to succeed in business has sustained me
through many long and difficult years. No matter what happens, as long
as I am still alive I will always be a businessman because its in my DNA
it is who I am.
I have found on many occasions that my spiritual drive has sustained my business side.
But
I have also found that my desire to follow the spiritual path has on
occasions put me in positions and caused me to have to take decisions
that at the time seemed as though I was putting my business at risk.
And now...
So
at this later stage in my life, I have come to realise that the
stronger of these two drives is my spiritual drive. But I am still and
will always be a businessman.
If this sounds contradictory and convoluted, maybe it is, but it is my reality and I have no regrets.
If were to die tonight I believe there may be a few people for whom I have in some small way helped to make a difference.
I trust I have more years ahead of me to enjoy further business success and to make a difference in more lives.
For myself, I can think of no better way to live or die.
Next Article:
Your core desire will fuel your efforts to achieve your desired success, but without focus those efforts can be wasted. So, the
second most important factor that will determine whether or not you
achieve your objectives is Your Point Of Focus
Return from "Your Secret For Success" to:
Just Because You Have A Spectacular Failure Doesn’t Mean The Game Is Over. The thought that you could fail can really slow you down. But the problem is not the failure, the problem is your relationshi…
Are You Lost In Transition? To be in an alien North African city, late in the evening, in the dark, completely lost in transition from the main market square back to the obscure location of our Riad…
Do You Believe What You See Or Do You See What You Believe? Like the characters in "The Matrix" we are fooled by the illusion that what we see is how things really are. Why? Because this is the mind's…
What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others? If you knew you were going to die tonight and you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would you say was the meaning of yo…
If You Want Others To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. If You Want To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. Compassion is derived from the Latin words "com pati" meaning to suffer with. It has been defined as…
The Power Of Expectation Of An Outcome Regardless Of The Lack Of Any Substance To That Expectation. Traditionally, the placebo effect occurs when false, or dummy, treatments of inert substances [that…
This Is What Will Happen After You Take It.
"This is your last chance," rebel leader Morpheus tells Neo, holding a coloured pill in each hand. “You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in y…
This Has To Be One Of The Best Ways For Living The Best Life You Can Possibly Live. An online search on life hacks will invariably provide you with multiple links to ways of increasing your productivi…
The Blessing And The Curse Of Impermanence. There is a story of a king who sought wisdom. Eventually he heard of a man living in a remote part of the kingdom who had a reputation for great wisdom. The…
The Stories That We Tell Ourselves Are A Matter Of Choice. The stories we tell ourselves form the backcloth and the tapestry of our lives. These narratives shape and define our sense of self and how a…
Trust Is A Choice And It Creates Your Reality. Nothing in life is permanent and nothing lasts forever. Every relationship ends in tears. Somebody leaves or somebody dies. This is how things are. This…
Finding This Hidden Value Is The Key To A Huge Upside. Most of us spend our lives working to linear rules where there is an equal relationship between effort and result. Work hard you get a result. Wo…
How To Be There When Preparation Meets Opportunity. The growth mindset holds the core belief that your intelligence and personality is something you can develop and that you can expand and grow. The p…
If you can't think of the right thing to say, say nothing.
The concepts we employ, the categorizations we apply and the words we choose and use to articulate a direct experience put us in a double bi…
To Believe Or Not To Believe - That Is The Question. Nothing has inflicted more suffering on humanity than its beliefs and dogmas. The religious and cultural beliefs that sanction and allow or impose…
How To Stay Far From The Madding Crowd. Herd mentality describes how we make decisions based on what everyone else is thinking and doing. It is also known as a mob or crowd mentality. We follow the he…
We Suffer Every Time We Believe A Thought That Argues With What Is. When your mind is perfectly clear, what is, is what you want. If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try…
Slack Is The Capacity To Effect Change And The Resource To Deal With The Unexpected. Many organizations are obsessed with efficiency and try to ensure that every resource is fully utilized to its full…
Less and less do you need to force things, until you arrive at non-action. We are brought up to believe that we get what we want in life as a result of what we do, by the actions that we take, that ha…
Is It Helping You Or Hindering You? Your point of focus is the central point of your attention. Your point of focus is a binary choice and the result of that choice is critical to your happiness, your…
To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for. The purpose of this article is to look at the foundation of the secret for succ…
Discover The Joy Of A Quiet Mind Can you stop thinking? According to Zen Buddhist priest Shunmyo Masuno the art of not thinking about anything is not easy to achieve. Even practising monks find it dif…
What Is Holding You Back From Pursuing Your Dreams? Your self confidence is based on ability. Your self confidence is all about your level of trust, faith and belief in your abilities [your power] and…
Learning how to overcome fear and perform powerfully is a skill that we all need to acquire as fear of failure affects most of us at some point in our lives. Whilst it is natural to feel a level of fe…
You are creating hell on earth when you are too subsumed within your underlying and deeply embedded negative energetic states. To counter your dissatisfactions and misery you initially go unconscious…
How you mentally characterize a situation has a profound impact on how you respond to it emotionally. There is a direct causal link between how you think about a situation, the words you use to articu…
What good is a universe without somebody around to look at it? What Conclusions Can We Draw About Living In A Participatory Universe? The inescapable conclusion is that the world and the universe (wit…
The journey home to the energy of life does not consist in arriving at a new destination it is a coming home to one’s self. [1] How are you feeling, what is your dominant emotion right now? [2] Where…
You have to be willing to suffer today in order to reap enormous rewards tomorrow. The long game is so hard to play because it involves taking a series of very small steps, that people rarely see, per…
How To Build Self Esteem In my early life and until my early twenties I suffered from a deep inferiority complex and low self esteem. Forty years later and, said in sincerity and with humility, I have…