On Becoming The Ferryman
The Art Of Living Is Knowing How To Make Use Of Suffering
As The Ferryman you transmute the base metal of your own pain and suffering to bring hope and healing to others
The Life Of The Ferryman
The traditional life of The Ferryman is all about transporting passengers from one side of a river or estuary to the other. He is needed where the water is too deep for a crossing on foot and where there is no bridge. In literature and mythology he is often seen as an agent of transition from life to death.
In this article we see the ferryman as an agent of transition, and a champion of compassion, in the context of suffering and pain.
We all want health, wealth and personal happiness. Yet it is in these three big areas that we all get tested, eventually. We all suffer at some point - one way or another.
Suffering is an unavoidable part of the human condition. Often we just struggle on through it as best we can until things take a turn for the better. But there are other times when there is nothing more we can do and still it goes on, and on.
Traditional teaching suggests that you have two options: you can resist suffering or you can accept it.
I want to offer you a third, and potentially more powerful option, you can use suffering.
You can let go of
self-centered worries and become a champion of compassion. It can be the
greatest happiness of all. But it comes at a cost.
Compassion is threatening to the ego. We might think of it as
something warm and soothing, but actually it’s very raw. When we set out
to support other beings, when we go so far as to stand in their shoes,
when we aspire to never close down to anyone, we quickly find ourselves
in the uncomfortable territory of “life not on my terms.”
Who Is The Ferryman?
In Buddhist thought and teaching The Ferryman is a metaphor for a champion of compassion.
- The Ferryman knows that we all cross the river of life together, that we are all in the same boat, we are all fundamentally the same and want the same things.
- The attitude of the Ferryman is that the pain that usually drags you down and causes you to withdraw into yourself is the stepping-stone for awakening your compassion and your understanding of the pain of others.
- The Ferryman seeks the best in all people and does his or her best to help everyone open to their true nature together.
Personal notes
In a recent article I shared how my late father suffered thoughout his life from many serious and tragic setbacks, and how he experienced depression, despair and a deep seated feeling of not being good enough.
Yet despite his pain and unresolved suffering he reached out to many people and through his personal kindnesses, and especially through his lifelong ministry as a Methodist lay preacher, he touched the lives of many people.
In preparation for his funeral I received the following tribute from someone to whom he had been a surrogate Uncle right to the end of his life:
“Don was one of the good guys and he made an intense and positive impact on our lives."
On a personal note, I carry wounds, deep wounds that I have borne for over 20 years - the best years of my adult life - and that I am not yet ready to share in a public forum such as this.
It is from these depths that I find the means and motivation to share, through all of the articles on this website, some of the little I have learned. I do this in the hope that it may bring help and support to many others in their passage across the river of life.
Further Reading:
- Making The Warrior Commitment
- The Grit In The Oyster, The Pearl In The Shell
- What Is My Life Purpose - Key Pointers To The Meaning Of Your Life
- More In Common And The Narcissism of Minor Differences
- Generativity - What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others?
Next Article: Things Of The Spirit
Return from "On Becoming The Ferryman" to: Walking The Talk
Or to: What Is Spirituality?
LATEST ARTICLES
Why Absence Feels Like Rejection - Thought Patterns in Relationships
The mind doesn’t just experience absence. It interprets absence. You send a message. It’s casual. Nothing heavy. Maybe a question, maybe a light comment. Normally you’d get a reply within an hour or t…Why Insight Alone Does Not Change Behaviour - Locking In The Gains
Insight Changes Understanding, But Not Jurisdiction. This article explores why insight alone does not change behaviour, not by dismissing thought awareness, but by showing what must come after it if c…The Mechanics Of Inner Conflict - Not Confusing Signals As Instructions
No Internal Signal Requires Immediate Obedience. Most people experience inner conflict as something emotional: tension, anxiety, guilt, hesitation, self‑doubt. It feels personal and psychological. Som…Master The Season You Are In - The Key to Fulfilling Your Purpose
To fulfil your purpose, you must first master the season you are in. One of the biggest mistakes you can make in life is focusing all your energy on the next season instead of learning to master the s…The Inner Weight of Shame - Sustained By Attentional Fixation
A Mind That Is Continuously Engaged In Self-Surveillance. Shame is one of the heaviest inner burdens a human being can carry. It does not announce itself loudly or demand attention through drama. Inst…Does Prayer Work? The Psychology of Prayer, Meditation and Outcomes
Reality Is A Complex System Of Countless Interactions - Including Yours. So does prayer work? The problem is that the question itself is usually framed in a way that guarantees confusion. We tend to a…Living in Survival Mode Without Surrendering Mental Authority
Living in Survival Mode Without Surrendering Mental Authority
Clear Thinking When You’re Just Trying to Stay Afloat. Many people today are overwhelmed because they are living in survival mode - not temporarily, but as a persistent condition of life. For many, th…Manifestation Without Magic: A Practical Model
Manifestation without magic is not a softer or more intellectual version of popular manifestation culture. It is a different model altogether. Popular manifestation teachings tend to frame reality as…Staying Committed When You Can't See Progress - The Psychology of Grit
Uncertainty Is Not The Absence Of Progress, Only The Absence Of Reassurance. One of the most destabilising experiences in modern life is not failure, but uncertainty and staying committed when you can…The Battle For Your Mind - How To Win Inner Freedom In A Digital Age Of Distraction
From External Events to Inner Events. We often think of “events” as things that happen out there: the traffic jam, the rude comment, the delayed email reply. But what truly shapes our experience is wh…How to See Your Thoughts Without Becoming the Story
A Practical Guide to Thought-Awareness. You can spend your life inside the stories of your mind without ever learning how to see your thoughts clearly and objectively. Most of the stuff we tell oursel…