How To Build Self Confidence

What Is Holding You Back From Pursuing Your Dreams?



How To Build Self Confidence - Setting The Scene

Before we address the  question of how to build self confidence, let's define what we mean by self confidence and highlight the distinction between that and self esteem.

Self esteem is based on value. Your self esteem is grounded in how you value and respect yourself.

Whereas, self confidence is based on ability. Your self confidence is all about your level of trust, faith and belief in your abilities [your power] and capabilities [your potential].

There is a deeper question that lies behind the question of HOW you build self confidence and that is WHY do you need to build self confidence?


What is holding you back from pursuing your dreams?

My honest answer to that question is that I spent many years of my life not living to my full potential because of fear.

This was primarily fear of failure, but also fear of what others may think, fear that I was not good enough, and fear of "not being ready yet".

What do you need to do, to overcome whatever it is that is holding you back?








[1] How To Build Self Confidence By Building On What You're Good At

I recall when one of my children was at primary school, her head teacher commenting positively on her academic performance, described how she how she had got what he called  "winner's wind". 

That is to say she had enjoyed an initial measure of academic success which would give her sufficient confidence to improve her performance next time and thus fuel further success.

Fast forward 30 years, and she is now a doctor of clinical psychology and holds two Master's degrees and a Graduate degree. Clearly, he had a good point!

So, if you are experiencing a lack of self-confidence, what steps do you need to take to develop your own personal "winner's wind"?

What successes do you already have that you can build on?

Everyone has strengths and talents. What are yours? Recognising what you’re good at, and trying to build on those things, will help you to build confidence in your own abilities.










[2] How To Build Self Confidence By Managing Your Thoughts

In my experience, a significant component of the power of any success strategy lies in the expectation that you will achieve your goal or objective.

Therefore, whatever you expect of yourself  sets the limit of what is possible for you. To quote Henry Ford:

"If you believe that you can do a thing, or if you believe you cannot, in either case, you are right."

We invariably rise [or sink] to the limits of our own expectations in life.

As you focus on how to build self confidence you need to be very aware of the internal dialogue, the self-talk , that's happening in your head.

There is a direct causal link between how you think about a situation, the words you use to articulate those thoughts, the energetic state associated with those words, and the results you experience.

People who are confident and successful, in any sphere of life, develop an ability to monitor and reshape their own thoughts:

  • They are vigilant and self aware of their own negative self-talk and replace it with positive and affirming messages of success and achievement.
  • Having accepted full responsibility for the choices they make and the thoughts they think, they consciously think in a positive way.

So if you want to be self confident, start thinking of yourself that way.

I can recall a situation in my own life when I unconsciously resisted looking inside myself to make some personal changes.

I waited for things to change “out there” so that I could feel better and build on that external change, until eventually I came to the realisation:

I had to feel better for things to change.









[3] How To Build Self Confidence By Having A Clear Point Of Focus on What You DO Want

Every single thought that you have, and especially the underlying energetic state associated with that thought, is influencing your life.

It’s either helping you or hindering you.

Your internal energetic states, your external behaviours, and therefore your results in life, are the direct result of your point of focus.

Over time, what you focus your mind on becomes your reality.

Your primary point of focus is a binary choice and the result of that choice is critical to your self confidence.

You can either focus on what you want and what you want to move toward and this will build your self confidence.

Alternatively, you can focus on what you don't want, what you want to avoid, what you are afraid of, and this will undermine and weaken your self confidence.

6 Key Pointers To Help Your Point Of Focus & Build Your Self Confidence.









[4] How To Build Self Confidence By Identifying Your Core Desire

If you want to achieve success in any area of your life then there is one very basic and powerful way to do this. It is easy to understand and is fundamental to your nature.

This is the way that people in all walks of life have achieved success from the beginning of time.

It is the building block upon which all success is built and the rocket fuel that powers it.

To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for.

Imagine you were lost in a desert and you soon become hot and thirsty. You would do or give just about anything to get a drink of cool, clear water.

This overpowering thirst is what we refer to as a "Core Desire".

When you are fueled by the conquering force of your core desire you build self confidence automatically.

3 Key Steps To Building Self Confidence By Identifying The Conquering Force Of Your Core Desire









Next Article:

Your Secret For Success

Return from: How To "Build Self Confidence"

to: Renewing Your Mind

Or to: Walking The Talk

Contact me









Zen-Tools.Net



English Chinese (Traditional) Russian French German Italian Spanish Vietnamese


LATEST ARTICLES

  1. Your Relationship With Failure Is Critical To Your Success

    Just Because You Have A Spectacular Failure Doesn’t Mean The Game Is Over. The thought that you could fail can really slow you down. But the problem is not the failure, the problem is your relationshi…

    Read More

  2. Lost, Stuck & Going Round In Circles?

    Are You Lost In Transition? To be in an alien North African city, late in the evening, in the dark, completely lost in transition from the main market square back to the obscure location of our Riad…

    Read More

  3. Seeing Is Believing Or Is It?

    Do You Believe What You See Or Do You See What You Believe? Like the characters in "The Matrix" we are fooled by the illusion that what we see is how things really are. Why? Because this is the mind's…

    Read More

  4. What Difference Did You Make?

    What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others? If you knew you were going to die tonight and you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would you say was the meaning of yo…

    Read More

  5. Compassion Is Selfish And You Need It

    If You Want Others To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. If You Want To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. Compassion is derived from the Latin words "com pati" meaning to suffer with. It has been defined as…

    Read More

  6. The Placebo Effect - 2 Key Takeaways

    The Power Of Expectation Of An Outcome Regardless Of The Lack Of Any Substance To That Expectation. Traditionally, the placebo effect occurs when false, or dummy, treatments of inert substances [that…

    Read More

  7. The Red Pill

    This Is What Will Happen After You Take It. "This is your last chance," rebel leader Morpheus tells Neo, holding a coloured pill in each hand. “You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in y…

    Read More

  8. Transformational Life Hacks

    This Has To Be One Of The Best Ways For Living The Best Life You Can Possibly Live. An online search on life hacks will invariably provide you with multiple links to ways of increasing your productivi…

    Read More

  9. This Too Shall Pass

    The Blessing And The Curse Of Impermanence. There is a story of a king who sought wisdom. Eventually he heard of a man living in a remote part of the kingdom who had a reputation for great wisdom. The…

    Read More

  10. The Stories We Tell Ourselves

    The Stories That We Tell Ourselves Are A Matter Of Choice. The stories we tell ourselves form the backcloth and the tapestry of our lives. These narratives shape and define our sense of self and how a…

    Read More

  11. Who Do You Trust?

    Trust Is A Choice And It Creates Your Reality. Nothing in life is permanent and nothing lasts forever. Every relationship ends in tears. Somebody leaves or somebody dies. This is how things are. This…

    Read More

  12. How Positive Asymmetry Can Transform Your Life

    Finding This Hidden Value Is The Key To A Huge Upside. Most of us spend our lives working to linear rules where there is an equal relationship between effort and result. Work hard you get a result. Wo…

    Read More

  13. 5 Tips For Developing A Growth Mindset

    How To Be There When Preparation Meets Opportunity. The growth mindset holds the core belief that your intelligence and personality is something you can develop and that you can expand and grow. The p…

    Read More

  14. Lost For Words? Experience Truth

    If you can't think of the right thing to say, say nothing. The concepts we employ, the categorizations we apply and the words we choose and use to articulate a direct experience put us in a double bi…

    Read More

  15. Belief - A Terrible Tyrant Or An Empowering Servant

    To Believe Or Not To Believe - That Is The Question. Nothing has inflicted more suffering on humanity than its beliefs and dogmas. The religious and cultural beliefs that sanction and allow or impose…

    Read More

  16. How To Avoid Herd Mentality

    How To Stay Far From The Madding Crowd. Herd mentality describes how we make decisions based on what everyone else is thinking and doing. It is also known as a mob or crowd mentality. We follow the he…

    Read More

  17. Are You Trying To Teach A Cat To Bark?

    We Suffer Every Time We Believe A Thought That Argues With What Is. When your mind is perfectly clear, what is, is what you want. If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try…

    Read More

  18. The Value Of Slack

    Slack Is The Capacity To Effect Change And The Resource To Deal With The Unexpected. Many organizations are obsessed with efficiency and try to ensure that every resource is fully utilized to its full…

    Read More

  19. 6 Tips To Help You Stop Trying Too Hard

    Less and less do you need to force things, until you arrive at non-action. We are brought up to believe that we get what we want in life as a result of what we do, by the actions that we take, that ha…

    Read More

  20. Your Point Of Focus

    Is It Helping You Or Hindering You? Your point of focus is the central point of your attention. Your point of focus is a binary choice and the result of that choice is critical to your happiness, your…

    Read More

  21. Your Secret For Success

    To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for. The purpose of this article is to look at the foundation of the secret for succ…

    Read More

  22. Can You Stop Thinking?

    Discover The Joy Of A Quiet Mind Can you stop thinking? According to Zen Buddhist priest Shunmyo Masuno the art of not thinking about anything is not easy to achieve. Even practising monks find it dif…

    Read More

  23. How To Build Self Confidence

    What Is Holding You Back From Pursuing Your Dreams? Your self confidence is based on ability. Your self confidence is all about your level of trust, faith and belief in your abilities [your power] and…

    Read More

  24. How To Overcome Fear And Perform Powerfully

    Learning how to overcome fear and perform powerfully is a skill that we all need to acquire as fear of failure affects most of us at some point in our lives. Whilst it is natural to feel a level of fe…

    Read More

  25. Dance Into The Light And Stop Chasing Your Tail

    You are creating hell on earth when you are too subsumed within your underlying and deeply embedded negative energetic states. To counter your dissatisfactions and misery you initially go unconscious…

    Read More

  26. Change Your Language To Change How You Feel

    How you mentally characterize a situation has a profound impact on how you respond to it emotionally. There is a direct causal link between how you think about a situation, the words you use to articu…

    Read More

  27. How To Live In A Participatory Universe

    What good is a universe without somebody around to look at it? What Conclusions Can We Draw About Living In A Participatory Universe? The inescapable conclusion is that the world and the universe (wit…

    Read More

  28. 4 Keys To Working With The Energy Of Life

    The journey home to the energy of life does not consist in arriving at a new destination it is a coming home to one’s self. [1] How are you feeling, what is your dominant emotion right now? [2] Where…

    Read More

  29. How To Deal With The Challenges Of Playing The Long Game

    You have to be willing to suffer today in order to reap enormous rewards tomorrow. The long game is so hard to play because it involves taking a series of very small steps, that people rarely see, per…

    Read More

  30. If You Don't Take Care Of You, Who Will?

    How To Build Self Esteem In my early life and until my early twenties I suffered from a deep inferiority complex and low self esteem. Forty years later and, said in sincerity and with humility, I have…

    Read More





The Balanced Life



The Balanced Toolkit



3 Keys Solutions


Get new posts by email:



Support This Site