The Redemptive Self
If I Can Do It So Can You - Fact Or Fantasy?
Focus on things you can control. Use the power of framing. Apply the law of response and outcome
The Redemptive Self - Overview
"The Redemptive Self" is the book, authored by Professor Dan P. McAdams, that coined the phrase.
McAdams has been at the forefront of efforts to apply narrative theory to the study of personality psychology.
Narrative Theory
During the 1980s, a number of psychologists developed and attempted to apply the concepts of narrative theory to show how people construct their identities through storytelling.
This description of human development and thinking processes proposes that we construct our life stories from personal and cultural materials that we have absorbed during childhood. According to the theory, we start to construct our personal narrative during adolescence as we begin to develop our individual sense of identity as a person.
A Very American Story
According to James M. Nelson in his review in 'The Cresset'
"Stories of redemption are some of the most powerful ways to express American identity and all that it can entail, from pain and anguish to joy and fulfillment.
Psychologist Dan P. McAdams examines how these
narratives, in which the hero is delivered from suffering to an enhanced
status or state, represent a new psychology of American identity, and
in turn, how they translate to understanding our own lives."
But do they?
Fact Or Fantasy?
How transferable are these narratives into other ethnicities, countries and cultures?
Can anyone achieve a redemption story?
In his review Nelson says that McAdams concedes:
"...there may be a negative side to these beloved stories of redemption..."
"Through no fault of their own, many Americans [and citizens of innumerable other countries] cannot achieve this revered story of deliverance."
"Instead, their lives are rife with contaminated plots, vicious cycles of disappointment, and endless pitfalls."
Story Or Myth?
In
my view the operative word in all this social theorising about the
redemptive self is "story" and a more realistic word would be "myth".
In the correct sense of the word, a “myth” is a story or narrative not
intended to be taken literally. The purpose and meaning of the narrative lies in the truth to which it points.
This may a “Truth” with a capital “T” to position it as a universal Truth or, as in this case, a partial truth.
Failure Is The Norm
Partial truth, as contained in the myths of personal narratives, have a useful role to fulfill - but it is wide of the mark to suggest or imply that: "If I can do it so can you".
Why do I say this? Why am I bursting this bubble?
These Successful People With Their Personal Narratives Of Redemption Are Outliers
The real Truth here is that failure is the norm.
We discussed this in some depth in How To Win Without Succeeding in the section on "Understanding Our Forgotten Failures":
- Winners are not the norm
- Winners are outliers
- We are prone to cognitive distortions e.g. survivorship bias
- We ignore the base rate data
- We confuse co-incidence and causation
- We craving a credible and coherent success story
- We have an Inflated perception of our chances of success
Redefining The Redemptive Self
An Alternative View
I want to propose an alternative and what I believe to be a more realistic and holistic view:
- That there is no single all encompassing narrative, but instead there is an continuum of experiences to each of which you have a choice as to how you will respond.
- That you build your own personal redemptive experiences upon a raft of partial truths and insights gained from these responses.
- It is the cumulative and compounding effect of these responses that ultimately shape your destiny.
- That the source of inspiration, creativity and power that fuels these responses can transcend the egoic self and can be drawn from your higher self or consciousness.
- That the generative sharing and transmission of these experiences is based on the toolkit of resources, information, tools and techniques that you have personally found to be useful and effective.
How do you do this?
[1] By understanding and using the power of framing
[2] By understanding the true location of your redemptive self.
[1] The Power Of Framing
- Focus on things you can control, ignore the rest - What this means is that whilst you may have no control over what happens to you, you DO have control over your response to what happens.
- Use the power of framing and change the way you look at things. How you mentally characterize a situation has a profound impact on how you respond to it emotionally.
- Apply the law of response and outcome - The outcomes that you experience are determined by your responses to the events in your life. This can be expressed as: Outcome = Event x Response. The strength and quality of your response is determined by the skills and the experience you bring to it. The stronger your response - the better the outcome.
[2] The True Location Of Your Redemptive Self
- My major criticism of the Redemptive Self as presented in narrative theory is that it is a construct of the ego. The ego can be likened to our own internal Window 10 operating system, and as such because its role is to control, it thinks it does (or should) control everything - which is non-sense and leads to a very limited perspective.
- Your higher self is the true source of your power, creativity and redemption. Think of your higher self as your hardwired portal to the universe and everything "out there" – or the dimension of spirituality or consciousness.
- Learn how to engage and build relationship with consciousness. The gateway to engaging with consciousness is not through the conscious
mind and it does not involve your ego. It all starts with some form of
inner prompting. This is felt in your heart not your head. The late Dr Wayne Dyer saw consciousness as beyond neutral and full of intention. In his
spiritual world view people who are connected to consciousness live
their lives on purpose and by intention in a co-creative relationship
with consciousness.
The Redemptive Self - Closing Thought
"The journey to Consciousness does not consist in arriving at a new destination where a person gains what he did not have, or becomes what he is not. [Aldous Huxley]
It consists in the dissipation of one’s own ignorance concerning one’s self and life, and the gradual growth of that understanding which begins the spiritual awakening.
The finding of Consciousness is a coming to one’s self."
Further reading:
What Is My Life PurposeIntroducing "The Balanced Toolkit" Approach To Life
Critique of Narrative Theory:
Let's Ditch The Dangerous Idea That Life's A Story
Return from "The Redemptive Self" to: The Meaning Of Life
LATEST ARTICLES
-
Going With The Flow - The Balance Of Being And Doing
Steer The Boat Each Day Rather Than Plan Ahead Way Into The Future. Going with the flow is about learning to become comfortable with uncertainty, and learning how to exploit the potential hidden withi… -
8 Principles For Success
A Timeless Foundation On Which To Build Your Success. There are Universal laws and processes that work to support us and guarantee that we achieve all our goals. But first we need to know what they ar… -
The Loving Father
A Love That Will Not Let You Go. I had a loving father. I knew that I did, but I never felt it. My father was a good man but very damaged and unable to show his feelings. So I grew up knowing in my he… -
Your Ebenezer Stone Of Help
How To Stay Connected To Your True Source Of Power. Approximately 2,500 years ago the Israeli town of Kafr Qasim was close to the site of two battles between the ancient Israelis and their neighbours… -
The Stockdale Paradox
How To Deal With The Attrition Factor. The Stockdale Paradox is named after the late James Stockdale, former vice presidential candidate, naval commander and prisoner of war during the American-Vietna… -
Embrace Your Fear Of Failure And Uncertainty
We Celebrate Success And Ignore Failure. Numerous studies have been undertaken on successful people to understand what it was that they did to become so successful, how they did it and when they did i… -
The Wilderness Years - 3 Keys To An Exit
How You Got Into The Wilderness Matters Less Than The Lessons To Be Learnt There. The wilderness years can be described as any lengthy time, longer than a year, that is spend aimlessly; without an imm… -
Boredom – Your Greatest Threat to Results
We Live In A World That Glorifies The Results And Not The Process. We all know what we should be doing, but the trouble with that is that sooner of later we get bored. The enjoyment fades, the excitem… -
The Luck Factor - 4 Basic Principles
You Can Master The Art of Creating Your Own Luck By Mastering 4 Key Principles "The Luck Factor" is the title of a book published 20 years ago based on the research of Professor Richard Wiseman who fo… -
Your Relationship With Failure Is Critical To Your Success
Just Because You Have A Spectacular Failure Doesn’t Mean The Game Is Over. The thought that you could fail can really slow you down. But the problem is not the failure, the problem is your relationshi… -
Lost, Stuck & Going Round In Circles?
Are You Lost In Transition? To be in an alien North African city, late in the evening, in the dark, completely lost in transition from the main market square back to the obscure location of our Riad… -
Seeing Is Believing Or Is It?
Do You Believe What You See Or Do You See What You Believe? Like the characters in "The Matrix" we are fooled by the illusion that what we see is how things really are. Why? Because this is the mind's… -
What Difference Did You Make?
What Impact Will You Leave In The Lives Of Others? If you knew you were going to die tonight and you were given a few minutes to reflect before that happened, what would you say was the meaning of yo… -
Compassion Is Selfish And You Need It
If You Want Others To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. If You Want To Be Happy, Practice Compassion. Compassion is derived from the Latin words "com pati" meaning to suffer with. It has been defined as… -
The Placebo Effect - 2 Key Takeaways
The Power Of Expectation Of An Outcome Regardless Of The Lack Of Any Substance To That Expectation. Traditionally, the placebo effect occurs when false, or dummy, treatments of inert substances [that… -
The Red Pill
This Is What Will Happen After You Take It.
"This is your last chance," rebel leader Morpheus tells Neo, holding a coloured pill in each hand. “You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in y… -
Transformational Life Hacks
This Has To Be One Of The Best Ways For Living The Best Life You Can Possibly Live. An online search on life hacks will invariably provide you with multiple links to ways of increasing your productivi… -
This Too Shall Pass
The Blessing And The Curse Of Impermanence. There is a story of a king who sought wisdom. Eventually he heard of a man living in a remote part of the kingdom who had a reputation for great wisdom. The… -
The Stories We Tell Ourselves
The Stories That We Tell Ourselves Are A Matter Of Choice. The stories we tell ourselves form the backcloth and the tapestry of our lives. These narratives shape and define our sense of self and how a… -
Who Do You Trust?
Trust Is A Choice And It Creates Your Reality. Nothing in life is permanent and nothing lasts forever. Every relationship ends in tears. Somebody leaves or somebody dies. This is how things are. This… -
How Positive Asymmetry Can Transform Your Life
Finding This Hidden Value Is The Key To A Huge Upside. Most of us spend our lives working to linear rules where there is an equal relationship between effort and result. Work hard you get a result. Wo… -
5 Tips For Developing A Growth Mindset
How To Be There When Preparation Meets Opportunity. The growth mindset holds the core belief that your intelligence and personality is something you can develop and that you can expand and grow. The p… -
Lost For Words? Experience Truth
If you can't think of the right thing to say, say nothing.
The concepts we employ, the categorizations we apply and the words we choose and use to articulate a direct experience put us in a double bi… -
Belief - A Terrible Tyrant Or An Empowering Servant
To Believe Or Not To Believe - That Is The Question. Nothing has inflicted more suffering on humanity than its beliefs and dogmas. The religious and cultural beliefs that sanction and allow or impose… -
How To Avoid Herd Mentality
How To Stay Far From The Madding Crowd. Herd mentality describes how we make decisions based on what everyone else is thinking and doing. It is also known as a mob or crowd mentality. We follow the he… -
Are You Trying To Teach A Cat To Bark?
We Suffer Every Time We Believe A Thought That Argues With What Is. When your mind is perfectly clear, what is, is what you want. If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try… -
The Value Of Slack
Slack Is The Capacity To Effect Change And The Resource To Deal With The Unexpected. Many organizations are obsessed with efficiency and try to ensure that every resource is fully utilized to its full… -
6 Tips To Help You Stop Trying Too Hard
Less and less do you need to force things, until you arrive at non-action. We are brought up to believe that we get what we want in life as a result of what we do, by the actions that we take, that ha… -
Your Point Of Focus
Is It Helping You Or Hindering You? Your point of focus is the central point of your attention. Your point of focus is a binary choice and the result of that choice is critical to your happiness, your… -
Your Secret For Success
To accomplish any success in life, you must identify accurately what it is that you hunger for, thirst for and long for. The purpose of this article is to look at the foundation of the secret for succ…